A quick Google search for “children’s discipleship” brings back resource
after resource—everything from catechisms to Bible memory systems to
pint-sized devotional books–all promising to produce faith in the next
generation of believers. What I rarely hear discussed is the necessity
of discipling our children through “natural revelation.” . . . As you go about discipling your children, as you teach them their Bible
verses and correct them when they disobey, do not neglect the sacred
discipline of awe.
Take them to the mountains to walk forest trails in search of the
millipedes and butterflies that are the works of his hands.
Take them to
the seashore to be knocked over by the power of a wave so that one day
they’ll know how to be knocked over by power of God.
Take them to the
art museum to thrill at colors and shapes and textures whose beauty can
only be explained by the One who is Beauty himself.
Take them to the
cities to crane their necks to the see the tops of sky scrapers and
shiver at God’s miracle of physics that keeps them from tumbling down.
Every new quarter (much better than a semester format) at Furman University, I felt a pit in my stomach. I would look at all the work listed on my class syllabuses, and feel overwhelmed.
This was the life of a chemistry major (it was kinda' tough) at a liberal arts college (that part was really tough).
Especially my last couple of years, when I had my hardest classes, I realized that I couldn't do it. I knew that I could not make the grades I wanted, while also playing football, all by myself.
It was a time to pray and trust God. And that's what I did. As soon as I saw my syllabus, I would pray for God to help me through the term.
And then was a time to buckle down and get to work.
My New Job
I'm in a similar situation now. Yes, I'm back at Furman, but not as a student. I now work for the university, in a part-time job at the Shi Center for Sustainability. I am the Program Coordinator for the Community Conservation Corps.
The short description is that I help low-income families get free assistancewith weatherization for their homes. The shorter description is that I'm a project manager, a set of responsibilities that's completely new to me.
And that's why I'm praying. I have had a lot to learn, in my two weeks of overlap with the previous coordinator (whose last day is today). So that leaves me, and a student worker (who will be done in a few weeks), and my boss (who is on maternity leave).
So that leaves me. And God. (And, of course, a great team of folks at Furman who will do everything they can to help me succeed in this role.)
I'm thankful to be in this role. And I see how my skills and experiences (especially community connections) will add value to this program.
But I almost turned this job down.
The Job Before Me
I applied for the job last month, and was invited for an interview. I was pretty surprised when I received a call a few days later offering me the position. During the interview, I didn't think they were impressed by what I could offer, for what the job needed.
But they made an offer, and I asked for the weekend to talk with my wife and think about it. And I very nearly said "no." I reasoned that . . .
Project management wasn't what I wanted to do. I thought God was drawing me to work with kids and youth.
The 20-hour work week would limit my time with my job with Elevate Youth, and other youth-related opportunities that would come up.
The job didn't pay as much as I thought it would.
But by Monday, I knew I needed to take it, and I'm glad I did. And that weekend's sermon from Grace Church was a key part in my decision (Coincidental timing? I think not.)
This was the job He put before me. He might use it to open new opportunities down the road (and of course, He may not).
I need to trust God enough to work diligently.
I need to be willing to work in a job that I don't necessarily enjoy.
I need to look for ways to meet the needs of those around me. And this job is such an opportunity to do that.
Above all that, God has created a world where faith is required (Hebrews 11:6). This job at Furman, like my years of schooling at Furman, is a way for God to drive me to trust in Him.
In September, I will be starting another new job. I will be teaching a 6th grade math class at Upstate Homeschool Co-Op, where our kids have attended. It's a new class for this co-op, and I'll teach two days per week, for an hour each day, for 24 weeks.
I've got some work to do, if I want to make this class engaging and helpful for 6th graders.
Again, I'll be depending on God for His grace and help.
More Great Teaching
I've also been learning a lot about work through some other great teaching from Grace Church. A group of eight of us guys are meeting weekly to discuss the material called A Man and His Work. Like the above-mentioned sermon on manna, these teachings come at just the right time.
Here are some of my take-aways:
God is a worker, and in my work I reflect His image.
I need to make money to provide for my family (as I wrote here).
Skillful and excellent work glorifies God.
I should provide something or some service that makes the world better.
Work shapes character.
I need to take Jesus to work, especially by praying through the day.
I look forward to growing in my new jobs (and my "old" one), and for seeing how God works through them, and in me.
Tomorrow is a special day for my wife and I. Only July 18, 1999 I asked Joanna to marry me (I was serious), and she said "Yes," of course.
I could give lots of reasons for why I asked her to marry me (here's 11), and many more for why I'm glad she did.
We have learned a lot over the past 16 years -- about each other, about our gracious God, and about ourselves. We've learned how selfish we can be, and we've learned that God can transform our minds and hearts. Even more, He transforms our hearts to want to be changed.
If there is one thing we have learned, and are still learning, it's that marriage is not about "fairness." Marriage is about sacrificially putting your spouse first. Marriage is about truly knowing that you are "one flesh" (Genesis 2:24).
Marriage is not 50/50. It's 100/100. It flourishes when both spouses give 100% of who they are, regardless of how they feel and irrespective of return expectations.
Here's what others have to say on this topic:
Jen Pollock Michel (Is This What Love Looks Like?): "Fairness cannot be demanded in marriage. Unfortunately, many refuse this advice, entering marriage today like collective bargaining. . . . The only biblical model for marriage we have isn't equity; it's self-sacrifice."
Philip Holmes (She Is Me): "Refusing to nourish my wife by providing for her is more foolish than not feeding myself. . . . God empowers me to see that she is me, and to love selflessly and sacrificially as I have been loved."
Matt Chandler (The Importance of Marriage): A 12-minute video, worthy of your time. My main take-away: If you want your marriage to stand out in this culture, make sure it's covenantal, not contractual. Here's the video:
Brett and Kate McKay (The Surprising Benefits of Marrying Young): A little off-topic, but applicable since I was 23 when I got married, and Joanna had just turned 25. "My goal with this article is to simply provide some reassurance to the
young gents out there who are in their early to mid-twenties, have
already met the right person, and feel like they’re ready to get
hitched, but are scared to pull the trigger because they’ve heard the
constant drumbeat of “Marry young and you’ll regret it!”"
Wives, be subject to your own husbands, as to the Lord.For the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ also is the head of the church, He Himself being the Savior of the body.But as the church is subject to Christ, so also the wives ought to be to their husbands in everything.
Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her,so that He might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word,that He might present to Himself the church in all her glory, having no spot or wrinkle or any such thing; but that she would be holy and blameless.So husbands ought also to love their own wives as their own bodies. He who loves his own wife loves himself;for no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ also does the church,because we are members of His body.
For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and shall be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.This mystery is great; but I am speaking with reference to Christ and the church.Nevertheless, each individual among you also is to love his own wife even as himself, and the wife must see to it that she respects her husband.
Finally, I highly recommend What Did You Expect??, the best marriage book I've ever read.
I love our family meal times. Not every meal time involves a serious discussion, but almost every Saturday morning I have been trying to focus my family on the Bible.
One of the themes that we've focused in on this past year is "Love God, Love Others." Some recent current events presented a great opportunity to explain Biblical forgiveness.
A few weeks ago, as I'm sure you know, Dylan Roof shot and killed nine people at a prayer meeting in Charleston, SC. Unfortunately, senseless murder is not too uncommon nowadays.
However the response by the remaining family members was striking. They offered forgiveness and prayed for God's mercy on him.
As a family, we discussed how we would feel if someone killed one of us. Sad. Angry. Upset. And those feelings are all valid.
Then I read Ephesians 4:32:
"Be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you."
Paul makes it clear that our actions should not be dependent on our feelings. Our actions should flow out of our relationship with Christ. That is, our love for God is directly connected with our love for others. And love for others should know no bounds, even if those bounds involve hate-filled murder.
If you've been following the story of this shooting (and probably even if you haven't), you know that our country is awash in a Confederate Flag controversy. Again. (Yes, I know that the flag is technically the Confederate Battle Flag.)
A few days after it began, I tweeted this late one night:
Any Christian who puts his "Southern Heritage" over our identity and unity in Christ, tramples on the gospel.
Now, as we are about to celebrate our nation's independence, I want to expand on that thought even more. It's not just "Southern Heritage" that Christians need to be careful of. We can put any other identity issue in that tweet as well.
Here are a few other variations you can try on for size:
Any Christian who puts his Patriotism over our identity and unity in Christ, tramples on the gospel.
Any Christian who puts his family ancestry over our identity and unity in Christ, tramples on the gospel.
Any Christian who puts his work or ministry over our identity and unity in Christ, tramples on the gospel.
Any Christian who puts his ethnic group over our identity and unity in Christ, tramples on the gospel.
Any Christian who puts his hobby over our identity and unity in Christ, tramples on the gospel.
Any Christian who puts his (________) over our identity and unity in Christ, tramples on the gospel.
Examine your heart. What could you fill in this blank with?
Remember, Christian, any freedom you have in your heritage is trivial compared to the freedom Christ brought for you.
These posts may help you think through why our Christian identity should matter so much:
A former co-worker (a Southern country boy through-and-through), began opposing the Confederate Flag at a Christmas Parade, over 7 years ago."I don’t know how the men on that float had the nerve to wave, smile, and
send Christmas wishes to the people lining the street while waving a
flag that symbolizes hatred to those same people."
It's hot around here, which means it's a good time to do a little reading. I've read a few fiction books this month, which is abnormal for me. One of those books was To Kill a Mockingham, my first time reading this classic.
Hopefully, you get time to relax with a good book. And maybe some good tweets, like these:
From Others
@TGC: 20 years of marriage have taught me much about my own heart and the way in which God works to make us like his Son. http://bit.ly/1IcMZIR
@Gospel_Project: It is important that we tell ourselves again today that we need the
grace of Jesus right now as much as we needed it when we first...
@BRobson90: Any other desire of our heart will look like rubbish when compared to
the immense riches and treasure of having Christ as our chief desire!
@GraceChurchCE:"God is God. I dethrone Him in my heart if I demand that He act in ways that satisfy my idea of justice." -Elizabeth Elliot
@ChrchCurmudgeon:Due to our inability to find VBS clean-up volunteers, tomorrow's wedding will be jungle-themed.
@JonathanOwens21: Guys, we are not just "offended" by the Confederate Flag. It's pain. Real, real pain. I wish people would understand that.
From Myself
Thanks to generous church members, I just dropped off a check to provide
partial scholarships for 5 kids to attend Long Branch's summer camp.
We have a dentist that gives out cookies, & an orthodontist that
gives out popcorn (& rents out movie theaters for all his clients).
Any Christian who puts his "Southern Heritage" over our identity and unity in Christ, tramples on the gospel. Had a great time at Landon Powell Hit House! Grateful for their investment in youth, and t… http://ift.tt/1HjRm5U
The biggest challenge and the most rewarding adventure I've ever had is being a Dad. I'm thankful for my three healthy, creative, goofy, and forgiving kids, and for my wife who helps me be a better father to them.
"You don’t lead because you are worthy, but because you are
called. And, my friend, you have been called— commanded and called by
God himself.
If you are a husband, you have been called. If you are a
father, you have been called. You have been called to lead—you and no
one else. You have been called to lead despite your sin and your
failure, despite your fear and apathy.
There is no backup plan, there is
no one to lead in your absence, no one better suited, no one
better qualified."
Do your kids struggle with selfishness? If not, stop reading now.
But for the other 99.8% of us, I have some thoughts for you. I could have used any number of examples over the past few monthsweeksdays hours. I will leave with one example.
Why this one? Because where I usually just overbear my children with commands ("Share, or else."), God showed me how I can engage their sinful hearts, while also affirm their value to God.
I often feel helpless in my feeble attempts to reach my kids' hearts. Can you relate? If so, Kim Ransleben has some great wisdom for us:
"Again, we know this parable in our own lives and in the lives of our
children. So often, we’ve seen them walk through the motions of a
gospel-centered life, doing what they “know” is right, but without the
power of the Spirit. They have the appearance of life and all the right
structures in place, but the heart is not beating. . . . God, being rich in mercy, promised that he would restore Israel. He
would give them life, fill them with his Spirit, make them his people.
Isn’t that all we really want for our kids? We want their hearts to be
his, not just their motions. We want God’s kingdom to come in them and
through them. We want them to treasure Jesus above all things.
And what
was true for Ezekiel’s day is still true for ours. The life for which we
long comes by speaking of the words of God — by sharing, again and
again, the word of Christ. . . . Go into the chaotic, death-filled valley of your kids’ sins and walk
amongst it all because you know that every raindrop that falls on the
earth today shows his mercy toward those who’ve rejected him (Matthew 5:45).
Serve them with peace and humility because you can smell the breakfast
cooking on the beach for a man who, three times, denied even knowing
Jesus (John 21:9–19). . . .
Do not fear the death you see in their lives. God knows what to do
with it. After all, dry bones are all he’s ever had to work with in his
people."
It's the most-cited passage of missionaries (and missions committees) everywhere:
"Go therefore and make disciples of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit,teaching them to observe all that I commanded you; and lo, I am with you always, even to the end of the age.” (Matthew 28:19-20)
But have we missed the point? Have we focused so much on the first word, that we have misunderstand the core command?
In the original Greek, there is one strong verb -- one command -- from Jesus: make disciples. The other verbs are participles, describing what it looks like to make disciples:
going
baptizing
teaching
Note that a better translation of "go" is "going." This is not a command to go anywhere, but to make disciples as we are going through life, everywhere and every day.
Helpful Questions as Your Children Go
In Sharing Jesus as We Go, Brian Dembowczyk explains that this means "as you go" or "as you are going." He explains:
"Realizing that the verb that begins the Great Commission can be
translated “as you are going” should give us a different perspective of
how we are to live it out. This verb phrase positions the Great
Commission as a task in our daily lives, not just on mission trips.
As I go to work. As I go to the store. As I go to school. As I go to the
ball field. As I go through my daily routine, whatever that looks like, I make disciples."
Then he gives four helpful questions we can use to guide them to think about how they can share Jesus as they go, not just when they go on mission trips:
Where do you go?
Who do you know?
How do you grow?
What can you show?
Of course, these same four questions will help us also live on mission for Jesus and the gospel. Be sure to read the full article.
"Sanctify Christ as Lord in your hearts, always being ready to make a
defense to everyone who asks you to give an account for the hope that is
in you, yet with gentleness and reverence." (I Peter 3:15)
Returned to Greenville after seeing family and friends in Savannah. After school programs growing. A weekend with 250 5th and 6th graders. Being almost doing with teaching.
It's been a good month.
Favorite Tweets From Others
@DalePartridge: When you feel like quitting, think of why you started.
@MarkMerrill: Your biggest confrontations in your marriage should not be with your spouse, they should be with yourself.
Tim Challies recently shared his story, about The Most Important Thing his parents did when they were raising him:
"I saw my parents living out their faith even when I wasn’t supposed to be watching."
While many oppose his thoughts (see the comments section), I wholeheartedly agree with him.
Of course, he (nor I) is not saying that there is a formula to your children making the choice to follow or reject the Lord. However, pursuing Jesus with your whole life is more important than anything you do for your child, in terms of their spiritual condition.
Even more, I would say that doing all kinds of spiritual tasks (taking them to church, signing them up for VBS, buying them Bibles, etc.) will be ultimately negated if they don't know that you trust in Jesus and follow Him.
When I was a Children's Pastor, I remember having a conversation with a young, single mom (who was questioning whether she should join a Small Group and serve in the church, because she was afraid it would take time away from her son. I told her, "The best way to become a better parent is to become a better disciple of Jesus."
It's a great day for those of us who are in Christ.
"He made Him who knew no sin to be sin on our behalf, so that we might become the righteousness of God in Him." (II Corinthians 5:21) "Allhave sinned and fall short of the glory of God,being justified as a gift by His grace through the redemption which is in Christ Jesus;whom God displayed publicly as a propitiation in His blood through faith. This was to demonstrate His righteousness, because in the forbearance of God He passed over the sins previously committed." (Romans 3:23-25) "For Christ also died for sins once for all, the just for the unjust, so
that He might bring us to God, having been put to death in the flesh,
but made alive in the spirit." (I Peter 3:18)
Have you ever taken a long trip with your kids, and heard this? If you haven't heard this, then you probably haven't driven more than 90 minutes with your children.
But in truth, we are not much different than our children. We like the idea of the destination, but we don't like the idea of the journey. We want to enjoy the fruits, without the labor.
The First Passover and Journey
Recall the story of the first Passover, in the book of Exodus. The Hebrews were told by God to leave Egypt on short notice. They packed up their essentials ("go-bags," if you will), and headed out, not even waiting long enough for their bread to rise.
And off they went on what amounted to be a 40-year journey.
During those years and years, can you imagine how often the Israelite parents heard, "Are we there yet?" Those parents didn't have DVD players or a Nintendo DS to occupy their children.
It's hard to imagine, but I guess 40 years in the wilderness is slightly worse than driving down I-95 to south Florida. There is nothing like crossing the GA-FL border and realizing you have only 360 miles to go. (There's a palm tree. There's another palm tree. There's another . .")
The Hebrews wanted out of Egypt, and they wanted to be in the Promised Land, but they didn't want to trust in God's provision of the time in-between. They wanted safety and provision from God on their terms.
Our Journey Today
When it comes to our spiritual journey, we are not much different than those Hebrews wandering in the wilderness:
We want heaven, but we don't want to endure in life's struggles.
We want spiritual maturity, but we don't want the daily disciplines of personal prayer and Bible reading.
We want the gospel to spread, but we don't want to make significant sacrifices to make it happen.
And yet we continue to ask Jesus, "Are we there yet?" We wonder if we have endured enough, learned enough, and served enough.
But if you are reading this post (or ignoring it), you know the answer is "No."
Parenting
We parents, especially if your children are preschool or elementary-age, wonder the same. We are physically and/or emotionally exhausted and wonder when we will be done.
We want respectful kids, but we don't want to discipline that 4-year old one more time. We want a good relationship with our children, but we fail to yield our desires and schedules to build into their lives. We want teenagers who are independent, but we don't want to go through the struggle and fear of letting go (and we don't have an on-going exit plan).
(And don't think I'm judging anyone. I'm more guilty of these things than anyone else.)
Not "There" Yet
What do we do? We follow the example of the Hebrews leaving Egypt at the first Passover:
Pack your bag. Understand the essentials of what you really need for this journey, as a disciple of Christ, and as a parent.
Take the first step. Realize that you may have to make many changes, but start with one.
Move. Make progress. Pursue your goal (as a disciple and as a parent) continually. Get help and support from others.
Keep enduring, knowing that life will be full of pressures and challenges.
Don't stop. Don't look back (one mistake that the Hebrews made). Don't settle for anything less that what God has for you.
Keep the faith. Know that God offers hope, rest, and salvation. He has proven His commtement to you through sacrificing His Son as the atonement for our sins.
"There remains, then, a Sabbath-rest for the people of God;for anyone who enters God’s rest also rests from their works,just as God did from his.Let us, therefore, make every effort to enter that rest, so that no one will perish by following their example of disobedience." (Hebrews 4:9-11)
I told a friend that one of my goals for 2015 was to go through 13-week journal based on Ben Franklin's strive for virtue. Following Franklin's example, each week I'd focus on a specific virtue, and note how often I failed.
My friend's response: "That sounds really depressing."
He was positively correct. And as I'm getting to the end of the 13-weeks, I'm absolutely glad I went through this depressing exercise.
How the Journal Works
Ben Franklin's Virtues Journal (from the Art of Manliness) has multiple parts:
A virtue of the week, including some modern day applications.
A scheme or schedule for each day.
A place to plan what good things you will do for that day.
A place to record what good things you did that day.
If you don't have a way to record points 2 - 4, this journal is a handy tool to use. However, in my daily journaling time, I usually cover points #3 and 4. And I use a steno pad and Google calendar to plan my scheme for the day.
Note: My latest time management technique is based on this Big-Medium-Little idea, though I modify it slightly.
The Burden of Virtues
Franklin's goal was to make himself more virtues by his own attention and efforts. Maybe it worked for him, but it hasn't for me. I find myself committing the same sins over and over. I fall short of my own standard of virtue, much less God's.
But my own weaknesses and failures are exactly why I'm glad I did this exercise. Instead of driving me toward self-righteousness, I have been pushed towards Jesus.
Over the past few months, I have realized more and more that I can never be perfectly virtuous / righteous / good on my own. I need Jesus' righteousness credited to me. And that is exactly what Jesus offered through His life, death, and resurrection.
"We have all become like one who is unclean, and all our righteous deeds
are like a polluted garment. We all fade like a leaf, and our
iniquities, like the wind, take us away." (Isaiah 64:6)
"He made Him who knew no sin to be sin on our behalf, so that we might become the righteousness of God in Him." (2 Corinthians 5:21)
