A Different Way: guest post

Showing posts with label guest post. Show all posts

Becoming a Better Parent, from the Inside Out

Can a movie help you become a better parent? Even more, can a kids movie help you?
Movies have helped me other times, such as with Toy Story 3 and Willy Wonka. And it happened again recently, when I took my sons to see Inside Out, the latest Pixar movie.

(Disclaimer and shout-out: We rarely go to movies, but this movie was provided for free for us, and for all the patients of Palmetto Family Orthodontics.)

How did this movie help me, and help me lead my family? We've started a new "tradition" -- sharing our feelings from the day, each evening at the dinner table.

(2nd disclaimer and shout out: This idea is also influenced by one of my favorite books I read this year, The Giver.)

Want to learn more about how God is helping me be a better parent, and what we are doing based on this movie? Check out my latest guest post on the Family Matters blog, How "Inside Out" Made Me a Better Parent.

Related Links:

Inside Out Can Help Parents Avoid This Big Mistake (from Crosswalk)
Inside Out: Lessons in Sadness, Sonship, and Prodigals (from CCEF)
Dysfunction Among Disney Families (just classic)

My Grandmother: A Woman of Influence

My Jewish grandparents had an immense influence on my life. While I didn't follow in their faith, I did learn a lot about hope and hard work.

They had hopes and dreams for my brother and I, some of which we didn't follow. But they never stopped loving us.

My grandmother, especially, poured out her time, energy, and money for our sake. When I look at the influence I get to have with the next generation, I see how her efforts have flowed through me. That is, not only did she bless me, but others are blessed because of her influence on my life.

I hope you'll read more of my story, and more about the story of my grandmother, on the Grace Church Women's Ministry blog. I had so much to say that I split it into Part 1 and Part 2.

Related Link:

The Beauty Under the Bridge

A Gospel-Positive Approach to Dealing with Selfishness

Do your kids struggle with selfishness? If not, stop reading now.

But for the other 99.8% of us, I have some thoughts for you. I could have used any number of examples over the past few ~~months~~ ~~weeks~~ ~~days~~ hours. I will leave with one example.

Why this one? Because where I usually just overbear my children with commands ("Share, or else."), God showed me how I can engage their sinful hearts, while also affirm their value to God.

How is that? Read more on my latest guest post for the Family Matters blog, Gospel Positive Correction.

I'm selfishly positive you'll want to do this.

Other posts on the topic of selfishness:

Selected guests posts on Family Matters:

The Gift of Encouragement

My wife and Gary Chapman agree: my "love language" is words of affirmation.

I'm not sure if my daughter, Hannah, knows that. But something she did recently filled my "love tank" to the full.

On my birthday (earlier this month), she gave me a beautiful handmade card. But the best part of the present was the gift of her encouragement.

Want to learn more? Check out my latest post on the Family Matters blog.

Then check out these related posts:

What Kind of Person Will Your Child Marry?

Have you ever asked your kids if they want to be married one day? (Far, far into the future, of course!) Have you ever asked them what they want their future spouse to be like?

If you haven't had this conversation with your children, this would be a good "assignment" for you as a parent. But before you do so, you may want to read my latest guest post on the Family Matters blog: What Kind of Person Do You Want Your Child to Marry?

I hope that post can help you in your conversations with your kids. And, since I am in the same process of discipling my children, I'd love to hear your thoughts and questions. Click on over to the Family Matters blog, and let us know what you think.

Defending the Innkeeper at Christmas

Last week, Family Matters published a guest post of mine, called Don't Despise the Faithful Innkeeper. In this last weekend before Christmas, I figured it was worth promoting again.

Why? Because despite most of us being on vacation from school and work, the days are about to get busy. Really busy, and really hectic. And if you are hosting family and friends, you'll probably feel like an overworked and under-appreciated innkeeper.

Remember the innkeeper from the Bible, in the Christmas story? Of course you don't, because he's not in there. There is only an allusion to him in Luke 2:7.

And yet we look down and despise him in all our Christmas plays and stories. And it's time we stop.

Let's look at the innkeeper in a new light. And let's remember that just as he was faithful right where God had him, God has you in a very important role, too.

Read Don't Despise the Faithful Innkeeper, and be encouraged.

Related Links:

Salvation: Not Automatic

As a (former) scientist, I like to think about problems and opportunities in terms of proven formulas. I want to know that if I do A and B and C, then Z will always happen.

But you know that life doesn't go like that. Life is complicated, and there are very few entitlements.

You're not any different as a parent. You'd like some guarantees for your children -- health, happiness, success, and (most of all) salvation.

Unfortunately we are not entitled to any of these. Check out my guest post on Family Matters, to read more on Not Automatic. And please share your questions and thoughts!

Related Links:

Changing Your Child

Does your child have any attitudes or behaviors that you want to change? I'm not talking just about little annoyances, but even significant issues related to their character.

I've discovered some bad news about this desire to change children: You cannot change them. Sure, we can do some behavior modification, but we cannot change their hearts.

But I've also discovered some good news about this: You cannot change them . . . but Jesus can.

Read more about how God has changed my life, and what He has taught me about changing my kids' lives, in my latest guest post on the Family Matters Blog, Changing Our Kids.

Related Links:

The Gospel for Middle Schoolers (and You)

Last week, I talked about the importance of the "why" of the gospel. But because I'm a parent of a middle-schooler, and an almost-middle-schooler, and because I lead a group of 6th grade boys in my church's student ministry, I am still thinking about this issue.

In fact, it's on my mind so much, I wrote another guest post for Family Matters. I hope you'll check it out.

It's called Helping Middle School Students Understand the Gospel.

In this post, I break down the gospel message into three parts (and I think much more clearly than in last week's post), and talk about why we tend to gloss over two-thirds of that message.

By the time you finish, I hope that you'll come to a deeper understanding of why your child (or student) needs the gospel, and why you need it, too.

Read the article, and I'd love to hear your feedback and questions (either here, or on the Family Matters blog).

Related Links:

Reflecting God's Image in Her Optimism

Where do you fall on the optimism - pessimism spectrum? What about your kids?

Me? I'm definitely on the pessimistic side. Or, as we negative-minded folks like to say, "I'm not a pessimist; I'm a realist." (As if we hold the only keys to truth.)

I can be so negative, that I once made it a goal to make myself think of one positive thing every day for a month. I have to work to be optimistic.

Not my daughter, Hannah. She is purely optimistic in nature. And while this causes some turmoil between us (mostly my fault), I am overjoyed that God created her with such hope and innocence.

In her optimism, Hannah is reflecting God's image in her.

Want to learn more? Check out my latest guest post on the Family Matters blog, called Reflecting God's Image in Optimism.

I'm positive that you'll enjoy reading it.

Then, check out the 2nd part of this series: My Son's Struggle with Pessimism. And Mine, Too.

My Son Is Learning to Pursue

Following up with my previous post, Men Must Pursue . . .

Not only are we (men) called to pursue, but we must help our sons do the same. The innate, core sin of all males is passivity. We naturally shy away from taking responsibility and action.

Want to read some examples of how I'm helping my son learn to pursue? Check out my guest post, How My Son Is Learning to Pursue.

Not only that, you'll learn how the gospel is connected to our call to pursue.

PS -- Thanks again to Family Matters for allowing me to guest post!

Related Links:

**image courtesy of Family Matters

Men Must Pursue

What is a man?

This question may be answered in a thousand different ways, depending on how your perspective. But here are two great definitions of manhood (both of which I got in some form from Grace Church):

A real man is one who:

Rejects passivity
Accepts responsibility
Leads courageously
Expects God's reward

Alternatively . . . the calling of a man is to pursue, provide, and protect. (The Art of Manliness blog substitutes procreate for pursue, but I prefer the latter.)

Men are called to pursue, not just in marriage, but in all areas of their life. Want to learn more? Check out the guest post I had on Family Matters, called Men Must Pursue. And I'd love for you to share your thoughts by leaving a comment on the Family Matters blog.

PS -- Thanks to Family Matters for allowing me to guest post!

PPS -- Here is part 2 -- My Son Is Learning to Pursue.

Related Links:

Boys to Men
5 Inspiring Articles from Family Matters
Wild at Heart [Book Review]

Helping Your Child Prepare for Camp

Last year my son Elijah participated in three camps -- 2 sleep-away and 1 day camp. He had a great time.

At one of the camps, I found out afterwards that he had a troubling incident. I was concerned and defensive, and ready to pull the plug on future camp experiences for him. But after several conversations with him and another parent (who shared his perspective and wisdom), I saw that I was being too hasty.

More than anything, we saw these camps as opportunities for my son to grow and deal with real-life situations, all under the protection of trained and trusted leaders.

Are your children going to summer camp this year? You can help them get the most of their experience by following these three principles: talk, connect, and equip.

Want to learn more? Check out my guest post, 3 Simple Ways to Prepare Your Child for Summer Camp, on Doctor Joe Says.

Related Links:

Review of "The In-Between" and My Other Top Books of 2013

Earlier this week, on my other blog, I listed the top books I read in 2013. Only a few of those were parenting books, per se. But a few of them helped me become a better parent, or at least reflect on the joys of parenting.

One of my favorite books I read last year was The In-Between, by Jeff Goins. I only read it because I received it in a give-away. I'm glad that I won it, because I would have been missing out had I not read it.

I wrote a review of this book as a guest post on Brave Reviews. To get you started, here is a snippet:

If you are a parent like I am, you know how much of a struggle it can be to wait. We don’t want to wait to know the gender of our unborn child. We can’t wait until they sleep through the night, and then when they are out of diapers. We can’t wait until our sons are able to mow the lawn.

I loved the story that Goins tells about his newborn son who is refusing to sleep one night. As his son fights back, Goins gives up hope, knowing that he will have to endure yet another sleepless night (Parents – can I get an “Amen”?).

You should click over to Brave Reviews and check out my full review, and then other book reviews on that site.

If you have a hard time being still and waiting, if you find yourself rushing in-between life's momentous experiences, you need to buy and read The In-Between.

(And if you didn't do it already, check out the other top books I read last year.)

Related Links:

AHA (by @KyleIdleman) [Book Review]
Cannery Row (excerpt)

Taking a Blogging Break . . . Sorta'

Since I'll be writing a novel this month, I need to cut back on my blogging. After all, averaging 1667 words per day is quite enough writing, don't you think?

But I won't let this blog go completely dormant this month. I plan to post:

short posts
funny videos
links to parenting resources
guest posts
old posts that have been re-worked

Thanks for giving me this leeway. In the meantime, would you please take this quick poll on my other blog? With just one click, you can let me know the first thing that you think of when you hear the word POVERTY.

I appreciate your help. Have a great week!

How I Was Mean to My Daughter

She sat on her bed and cried, “Daddy, you’re being mean!”

No words could have cut me deeper. I wanted to defend myself, and I wanted to lash back at her. And I’m sure I did not immediately respond in a loving and nurturing way.

But the Holy Spirit caught me. He showed me that she was right, but not in the way that she (and I) thought initially.

Let me explain. . . .

Be sure to read the rest of the post on Epic Parent, The Day I Was Mean to My Daughter.

Guardians ad Litem: A Different Way to Make a Difference

Thanks to Cherie Walker, Public Awareness Supervisor from the South Carolina Guardian ad Litem program, for writing this guest post. You can learn more about this program by visiting their website or by calling the statewide number (800-277-0113).

A Different Way to Make a Difference
Have you ever worried who cares about the children who have been abused or neglected in Allendale County? What about the children who are now in foster care? Well, there is a group of people in Allendale County who make a difference for these children. These people are called Guardians ad Litem.

Guardians ad Litem are ordinary people who volunteer a few hours a month to make a difference for abused and neglected children. In 2010, nine volunteers made a difference in the lives of 37 children in Allendale County. One of those children was Yolanda Sanders.

Yolanda entered foster care when she was 13 years old. Being a teenager in foster care has its own challenges. "I moved to 10 different places in the last 5 years," says Yolanda. "It was horrible; I hated to move. It seemed like I moved every three months. It was hard for me to make friends, and when I did, I ended up moving. Having to start over in all those new schools, I couldn't get what I needed to finish high school. So I just went and got my GED."

But through all the moves, one person was always there for Yolanda: her Guardian ad Litem, Jan Bellinger. "Ms. Jan has been a part of my life since the first month I was in care. She helped me when I got frustrated, and didn't want to talk. There were so many people coming in and out of my life. Other people where walking out, or giving up on me. But Ms. Jan was always very nice and willing. She didn't try to force me not to feel what I was feeling."

What would Yolanda say to someone who was thinking of becoming a Guardian ad Litem? "Do it, because you'll love it! You'll meet some great kids, with great talents. They just need that extra person to speak up for them, because they can't speak up for themselves. I think that Guardians ad Litem are very special, loving people."

If you would like to learn more about the Guardian ad Litem program, call the Allendale County office at (803) 625-2450 or visit www.allendale.scgal.org. You can also stay connected with the program through Facebook.com/GALVolunteersSC or Twitter @GALvolunteersSC.

More About "How Do We Know That God Is Real?"

A couple of weeks ago, I re-posted an old article I wrote, about Elijah asking me, "How do we know that God is real?" Because of a dubious choice I made to post it on a particular website, I got a slew of comments (mostly negative) within a few hours.

The following week, I posted a response to these comments last week, re-explaining the purpose of my post, plus sharing my thoughts on the comments I received.

One particular comment was from a friend of mine. You might have missed it, so I wanted to republish it as it's own post, as it was full of logic, support, and vulnerability. I don't exactly have his permission to do this, but as they say, it's easier to ask for forgiveness . . .

Here it goes:

Wow, lots of activity here over what Joey wrote. I enjoy a good debate over the important things of life as much as anyone. However, notice that the point of Joey's blog isn't necessarily apologetics but parenting. Here the two topics have intersected a bit but this really isn't the best forum for debating atheism vs. Christianity.

So I waited a few days to post this so as not to provoke the reddit visitors to a debate. I hope for the next few points to be for any of Joey's typical readers who might have read through these comments. If you'd like to debate those finer points then I'd welcome you to a few links below to hash this out in a more suitable venue.

1) There is lots of internal and external evidence for the resurrection of Jesus. Here are two links for anyone interested in what that looks like.

http://www.reclaimingthemind.org/blog/2011/04/evidence-for-the-resurrection-in-a-nutshell/

http://thegospelcoalition.org/blogs/justintaylor/2011/04/21/is-there-historical-evidence-for-the-resurrection-of-jesus/

2) Even though Joey was not raised a Christian, believing something just because of the culture you were raised in doesn't mean it's not true. A source of information doesn't necessarily correlate with it's veracity. If I read from some tea leaves that Barack Obama was currently president of the USA that statement would still be true even though my methods were suspect.

3) Evolution doesn't disprove Jesus' resurrection or that the universe had a creator. Just ask the Pope.

4) The "battle between science and religion" is a made up one that gets a lot of play because people a drawn to conflict. Plenty of devout theists have been pioneering scientists. Newton, Pascal, Lemaitre, Mendel, Collins, Pasteur, etc…

5) Along the same lines, there is no scientific proof that we should only accept scientific proof. Logic, reason, math, history, morality, etc…. all contain truth that is unaccessible by science.

6) Joey's kids have not been ruined by religious indoctrination. He left a safe corporate job to serve a church and now he's left that steady environment to serve the poorest and most hopeless people in the state. Teaching kids to take care of the most vulnerable people in society is the right thing to do.

Lastly, if any atheists have made it this far I am sorry to the extent that the church has (and it certainly has) let you honestly believe that the straw man "Xianity" you hate so much is real. We are fallen and imperfect people and need your patience and forgiveness. If it helps I don't believe the god you've rallied against here is real either.

I would love to hear any other thoughts and comments you might have.

Related Link:

Do We Need Evidence for God?

You Could Take Communion If You Haven't Been Baptized. But You Shouldn't.

image courtesy of lumix2004 via sxc.hu

I intentionally published this two-post series on Communion and Baptism by Jeremy Keever this week because today is St. Patrick's Day and Jeremy has an Irish heritage. (It's also when many Jews celebrate the Fast of Esther, before Purim, but I'm the only one here that's Jewish.) He has written several articles on the Grace Church Pastors Blog, including a brief but informative piece about St. Patrick.

For all you Irish folks, I honor your heritage with a link to this video from Tripp & Tyler.

Hey, what a great reason to read this blog and tell your friends about it (and what great evidence that the gospel is real): where else can you find a southern Irish boy and a yankee Hispanic Jew come together to talk about Jesus?

Even more, I'm excited to be spending much of today and the weekend with Jeremy, as he is leading a group of college students down here in Allendale for a mission trip.

As you can see from the last post, baptism and communion are the two ordinances that all Christians have historically observed. Both are commanded in Scripture and both proclaim the gospel message of grace and acknowledge our need for Jesus. Participation in these two ordinances does not make you a Christian. In fact, both of them proclaim the message that Jesus death, burial and resurrection is all that makes salvation possible for mankind.

So with that background information in mind, here is why I believe “the norm” should be baptism before communion:

Baptism is intended to be one of the main marks of a Christian. For those who claim to be Christians and partake in communion without baptism, they send mixed signals to non-believers, those with a weaker faith, and to the Christian community they are identifying with.
It is the first act of obedience. Throughout the New Testament, the first thing that converts are told to do is to be baptized. All non-baptized Christians need to seriously ask themselves why they haven’t been baptized.
It signifies blessings/coverings without identification. You can be married and enjoy the benefits of it without a ceremony, exchanging rings, sharing the same name or telling anyone that you are married. But you won’t find anyone that recommends it. In fact, it would take another blog or two to unpack why it is such a terrible idea. Likewise, there is something wrong with those who want to participate in the benefits of the cross but are unwilling to identify with Christ through baptism.
It provides a false sense of comfort. When we take communion, we take comfort in partaking in the benefits of Christianity. However, without being baptized, we need to seriously ask ourselves if we truly are covered by the blessings of Christ if we are being directly disobedient to such a specific biblical mandate.

Can someone be a Christian, not be baptized and partake in communion. Absolutely. Should it happen as often as it does? Absolutely not! Can we all think more seriously about the biblical mandate of baptism, what it signifies, and why all Christians should observe it? I think so.

For a closer look at baptism within the NT study the following texts:

Mark 16:16; Acts 2:38, Acts 8, Acts 10:48, Acts 16:33, Acts 18:8, Acts 22:16.

Related Links:

Should I Take Communion If I Haven't Been Baptized? Theology

image courtesy of lumix2004 via sxc.hu

I started to write about why baptism should precede communion, before realizing that I am a woefully inadequate theologian to cover a topic like this. That is why I am thankful for Jeremy Keever, one of the pastors at Grace Church. He is not only a talented teacher and writer (for elementary-age kids, teenagers, and adults), but also a good friend. He and his wife Kelly have already contributed to this blog, sharing their perspectives on why they have intentionally chosen to have their kids in public school. That has been one of our more popular posts and series, and I'm sure you'll enjoy this 2-post series as well.

At Grace Church, where I am a member, we observe the ordinance of the Lord’s Supper monthly. I have always enjoyed the freedom and worshipful environment that is created as we “go to the table.” The pastoral team is very clear that this is meant to be a family (those who are in Christ) event. As a church we encourage all people to be a part of our weekly gathered worship services. In fact, we take very intentional steps to make sure non-Christians, de-churched and people of all faiths feel welcomed with us. (Side Note: Good thing that is what Jesus did!)

However, the very act of taking communion is divisive. There is really no way around it. Those who take communion are acknowledging their love for Christ, communicating their daily need for his broken body and his spilled blood to cover their sin, and proclaiming the gospel message. Those who don’t are non-verbally choosing to not identify with him.

Over the years I have become increasingly concerned at how many people actually observe The Lord’s Supper. We know that people regularly get up and take communion who claim to not be a Christian or who have never been baptized.

In order to adequately answer the question at hand, we need to first be clear on what we are talking about:

Baptism is one-time act of obedience and worship to identify with Jesus in his death and resurrection for those who have received the benefits of the saving work of Christ. A few important components:

It is a one time act
It is commanded by Jesus and the Christian Church
It identifies you with the church body
It proclaims the gospel to the world

Communion (The Lord’s Supper) is an ordinance that celebrates the breaking of Christ body and the shedding of his blood for sinners. We remember the event, celebrate the covering it brings and are nourished by partaking in worship.

Is to be observed continually
Is a sign of continued participation in the benefits of Christ’s death
Signifies unity with the church
It proclaims the gospel message to the world

Be sure to read the rest of the interview.

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