After School and Summer Camp, Strategically

Happy Campers

A young man we know played football this past year, for the first time. In our area, a number of middle schools come together at a particular high school to practice as one team. While this sounds logical in terms of maximizing resources (fields, coaches, etc), it also unintentionally excludes many children from participating.

How? Because there is no busing from the middle schools to the high school. So any middle school student who wants to play must either have a ride, or must take the bus home and then walk to the school.

Many families are not able to solve this transportation issue, particularly when both parents have to work, or in a single-parent family. Therefore, those disadvantaged students tend to participate in after school programs at lesser frequencies. This phenomenon is known as The Activity Gap.

One Mom's Solution

The mom of this young man is doing what she can to solve this problem. She had the flexibility to bring her son to practice each day. But she didn't just think of her son's need; she provided a ride for other kids who needed it, too.

I loved how she thought through the extra-curricular activity strategically and missionally.

Summer Camp Strategy

Is your child going to summer camp this year? I hope so. I know that summer camp experiences can be enriching for the mind, body, and soul.

But I also hope that you are thinking through this issue strategically. What do I mean? Check out my post on Just Kind Humble: Summer Camp for a Purpose, to learn more.

Top Posts in 2014

Happy New Year!

I'm easing my way back into blogging, after a nice blogging break. To get myself (and you) ramped back up, here's a quick recap of the past year of blogging. Did you miss any of these posts?

Here are my top 5 posts from this blog in 2014:

#5.  Roe v Wade: Do Your Really Believe What You Say You Believe?  Years ago, a man in our church shocked me when he said, "Most people who say they are pro-life really aren't. They are just anti-abortion." I was challenged by his assertion, and I hope you are, too.

#4.  Celebrating Passover as a Messianic Jew.  Can you be Jewish and a follower of Jesus? Of course! And here is one reason it is meaningful to me.

#3.  Common Core Is NOT the Common Problem.  To some, this was controversial. But I also received a lot of support about this post. For more thoughts on politics and education, check out My Thoughts on the Upcoming Elections.

#2. "How Do You Know that Jesus Is Real?"  A question one of my sons asked me a couple of years ago.

#1.  Teaching Preschoolers About the Crucifixion?  Another archived post (from 2011), I think this one (along with the above post) gets a lot of interest because evangelical parents are looking for ideas to communicate theological issues to their young children. 

Another Blog

And though my Mission: Allendale blog has been static since August, I still get some traffic there, as I close in on a not-too-shabby 50,000 page views there. On that note, here are the 5 most popular posts on that blog over the past year:

#5.  How Would You Define (and Solve) Poverty?  Like with #1 (see below), I go back to this post and this book over and over. Have you read it?

#4.  Financial Demise in Allendale.  A sad story, not just about an institution, but about a mindset.

#3.  Does Poverty Affect Life Expectancy?  A post from 2013, it still brings up an important truth: “Living in a high-poverty area often means a lifetime of struggle with underperforming public schools, limited job opportunities, higher crime rates, and poor nutrition, health care and housing — all of which can add up to a shorter, sicker retirement.”

#2.  The Big Announcement.  Our family spent months wrestling over the next step that God had for us. And apparently, other people wanted to know, too; when I published this, it was the highest ever single-day traffic on this blog. (In January, I tried to answer the FAQ: Where Are You Going Next?)

#1.  Feeling the Pain of a Fatherless Generation: Angry Boys.  Since I wrote this 2.5 years ago, it's been the most popular post. I go back to these thoughts (and the book I stole them from) over and over.


Happy reading!

**image courtesy of rkirbycom via rgbstock.com

Favorite Tweets from October

I hope you get a monster amount of candy for Halloween. Or just because it's Friday. Whatever reason you need.

Here's another treat for you -- some of my favorite tweets that you may have missed this past month.

From Others:

@FallonTonight:  A Russian group nominated Putin for a Nobel Peace Prize. "I'm all about peace," Putin said. "Piece of Ukraine, piece of Poland…" #fallonmono

@Jonnie_W:  Just met @DrGaryChapman in an elevator, and I got flustered. Hope he knows my Love Language® is sweaty palms. 

@BurkParsons:  In his sermon on the mount Jesus demanded perfect righteous of us, in his death on the mount he fulfilled it for us.

@JoeWaters_GVL:  "Childhood poverty gets biologically embedded." - Dr Gorski 

@JamieTheVWM:  Maybe we should stop saying "Jesus loves you." and start saying "I love you. Jesus taught me how."  

@TheFatherEffect:  Your kids learn about grace by watching you give it to others. #TheFatherEffect 

From Me:

To boost young brains, get kids to #exercise. http://buff.ly/1nf5UMw  #education

Definitely a good sign --> "As overtesting outcry grows, #education leaders pull back on standardized tests." http://buff.ly/1qKK5R2 

Another reason why @AstronautAbby should be the first to go to Mars! http://www.slate.com/articles/health_and_science... #NASA

Will this video inspire students to go into #STEM-related careers? #Chemistry is beautiful!! http://buff.ly/1sGruZq  

A little encouragement for the football coaches at Greenville High. @McDonalds http://ift.tt/1DxsPqp  

Favorite Tweets for July

Here is a picture of our kids, in front of our old house (Simpsonville, SC), as we packed up moved to Allendale in June 2011:

 

Here they are on their last morning in Allendale:

It's been a wonderful 3+ years! We are sad to leave Allendale, but thankful for all the blessings for our family as we lived there.

Moving on, here are some of my favorite tweets from the past month.

From Others:

@mac_cavin:  At least I don't have to watch soccer for another 4 years..

@PastorTullian:  One more time: The phrase "gospel-driven" is becoming just a new and covert way to keep the focus where we love to keep it: on ourselves.

@PaulTripp:  The greatest rescue of grace is not from the evil outside of you, but from the power of the evil inside you.

@FunnyIsFamily:  I don't always tell my kids how to dress, but when I do it's because they want to wear fleece to the pool.

@remissional:  Would our world look different if church was who we were always and not where we went on Sundays?

@plattdavid:  Christ calls us to engage culture with a firm grip on His gospel & a fervent passion for His glory.

@JustTweets:  Tolerance is a parody of love. 

@HomesOfHopeSC:  In West Greenville, where we have 110 homes, 61% of residents live below the poverty line. Affordable housing is necessary. #StraightTalkSC  

@MarkMerrill:  Your biggest confrontations in your marriage should not be with your spouse, they should be with yourself.

From Me: 

I paid at the pump but a receipt didn't print. Now I have to go inside. #firstworldproblems

Why my stomach turns when someone tells me, "I was reading your blog the other day,..." http://buff.ly/1rX29sT  #blogging

The best part of ordering fajitas at a restaurant: the look of envy on all the other customers' faces when your food comes to your table.

I never miss reading these blogs: @MichaelHyatt, @VergeNetwork, & @GCDiscipleship. http://buff.ly/TUFYYz

"I wish there were more gnats in #AllendaleSC." ~ No one ever 

My #StandOut results (from 2011) have kept me energized & focused. Thanks @mwbuckingham ! http://buff.ly/1qrw9fq 

"Everything that can be invented has been invented." Charles Duell (Commissioner, US Office of Patents) (1899) #fail 

Is this a good thing? Or an avoidance of the real issues? --> "End High School Exit Exams" http://buff.ly/1tXW0Bq  #education 

Any 1st grade teachers (& their principals) need to check out @TheFirstFund http://buff.ly/1qvTfpN  #education #poverty 

What's up, Boys State! Know this guy? http://ift.tt/1nl47nl   

Favorite Tweets from June

We are wrapping up our season of living in Allendale. We are thankful for so many great memories. And, apparently, some folks are thankful for us.

Here are some of my top Tweets from the past month. You can connect with me at @EspinosaJoey.

By the way . . . beginning next week, I will have a slightly different schedule for blog posts. It won't change this blog much, as I will now be posting on Tuesdays and Fridays (instead of Tuesdays and Thursdays). I will occasionally post on Wednesday or Saturday.

The biggest change will be on my Mission: Allendale blog, which will now have only two posts per week -- Mondays and Thursdays. And, since we will be moving next month, I plan to phase that blog out entirely before too long.

If you don't have any questions about that (you can leave a comment or contact me), on with the tweets!

From Others:

@artofmanliness:  Man is more himself, man is more manlike, when joy is fundamental thing in him, & grief superficial. G.K. Chesterton 

@thescottbleckler:  after reading the State paper's "Candidates at a glance," it's obvious that about half of them are clueless politicians.

@FallonTonight:  Just in time for Father’s Day, Jimmy reads your #Dadvice tweets: http://youtube.com/watch?v=iNHUTcQ1Xv4 …

@ShawnUpchurch:  “However beautiful the strategy, you should occasionally look at the results.” ~Winston Churchill #leadership

@Krafto:  "I've never met a confused, productive employee" (@mwbuckingham). If you want to be productive, you have to know your goals. 

@Gospel_Project:  God communicates His commands, and then He breathes His Spirit into our hearts, enabling us to learn, live, and love.

@CoachMotto:  There's nothing wrong with losing unless you learn to accept it. – Paul Brown

@JamieTheVWM:  I'm an amazing writer when I'm in the shower.

From Me:

Hardee's was slam-packed at lunch today, because, you know, where else are you gonna' go? #AllendaleSC

Why provide books? Disadvantaged children are less likely to have access to books at home or libraries. http://buff.ly/1h8HO2R  #poverty

"God is committed to our righteousness, because it shows others that He is a perfect Shepherd." @WilliamKane1, @CBCofSavannah, #Psalm23

5.04 miles in 41 minutes. Maybe my last long run in #AllendaleSC.

"I didn't have to put my brain on hold to become a Christian. But I did have to overcome my pride." @LeeStrobel (The Case For Faith)

If I am going to spend $8.29 on lunch, I promise it won't be at Long John Silvers. #nothanks http://ift.tt/1mSefiI   

Everyone check out the hashtag #Allendale2k14 for great moments from the @gracechurchsc-led trip to Charleston for #AllendaleSC students.

Taking a Blogging Break . . . Sorta'

Since I'll be writing a novel this month, I need to cut back on my blogging. After all, averaging 1667 words per day is quite enough writing, don't you think?

But I won't let this blog go completely dormant this month. I plan to post:

• short posts
• funny videos 
• links to parenting resources
• guest posts
• old posts that have been re-worked

Thanks for giving me this leeway. In the meantime, would you please take this quick poll on my other blog? With just one click, you can let me know the first thing that you think of when you hear the word POVERTY.

I appreciate your help. Have a great week!

Favorite Tweets for October

Happy Halloween! Here are some sweet tweets from October:

From Others

@TeachForAmerica:  "The barrier for my students is that they don't think college is possible. But they just need motivation and information." #EducationNation

@PaulTripp:  You have hope because God's glorious, unstoppable grace means he will not turn his back on you, even on your worst day.

@DaddysinCharge:  Kids: 0 to 100 mph the moment they wake up.

@FirstWorldPains:  I hate being overweight, but the one thing I hate more than being overweight is exercising.

@GraceChurchSC:  What have you left OR what do you need to leave to follow Jesus? #riseandfall Luke 5

@mwbuckingham:  Passion isn't something that lives up in the sky, in abstract dreams. It lives at ground level, the details of what you're doing every day.

@MarkMerrill:  Our children need to know that we love them for who they are, not for what they do or don’t do.

@donaldmiller:  If I’m not excited about spending another day with God, I’ve likely lost track of how good God is.

@CoachWithLove:  Opportunity may knock only once, but temptation leans on the doorbell. 

@DavidAllston:  Just heard on the radio about a pastor who has discovered a biblical code to help me make money. Count me in!!

From Me

Why do @benbaldridge7 & @WBlantonSoccer think it's a good idea to have babies near spring break? A damper on our plans for soccer camp.

Great reminder (via @slate) if you are traveling overseas: Don't give money (or gifts) to poor children. http://buff.ly/16b2sYI  #poverty

At my first #Gamecocks game in 20 years. Recruiting trip. No, not for me. For the 4 #AllendaleSC football players with me.

What We Spend -- and Don't Spend -- to Raise a Child

About a year ago, I shared a story about a conversation I had regarding The Cost of Kids.

From this article in the New York Times, it turns out that calculating how much parents spend on their children is not one-formula-fits-all. The amount spent depends on the income level of the parents.

• Low-income parents (who earn less than $60,640 annually) spend about $173,000 from birth through high school.
• Middle-income families (earning between $60,640 to $105,000) spend about $240,000.
• High-income families (bring in more than $105,000 each year) spend nearly $400,000.

Therefore, this report from the USDA doesn't so much show how much it costs to raise kids, but what is NOT spent on some children, particularly on those growing up in poverty.

The difference between children from the lowest and highest income groups is about $12,000 per year. So, those children are missing out on $12,000 of resources, opportunities, and benefits. At the least, they are dependent on others (outside of their parents) to provide them.

It's not that children from low income families cannot succeed. But when you look at the bigger picture, it becomes obvious that the well-resourced families can provide better opportunities for their children, who in turn are able to provide better opportunities for their children. And so on and so forth.

"When you look at the forest, rather than at the trees, financial statistics like these do reflect different outcomes for the children whose experiences they shape: true economic mobility is becoming more a pipe dream than the American Dream, and children are likely to stay within the income category to which they are born."

For additional reading, check out these posts from my other blog:

• The Cost of Child Poverty  
• Inequality and Poverty  
• College and Finances  

**image courtesy of Nick Nguyen via flickr

Favorite Tweets from September

It was a good month:

My daughter turned 12.

I got to eat at Moe's.

And I read (and wrote) some good tweets.

Pssst -- you can follow me on Twitter (@EspinosaJoey)

Tweets I Read

@BackRowBaptist:  My church wants to have a "revival." I don't remember the first time we were vivaled.

@JimGaffigan:  Whose bright idea was to have cooked broccoli smell like urine?

@JulianWasHere:  I'm going to invent a mechanical arm that mounts onto my chest and never stops feeding me pistachios.

@CoachWithLove:  Failure is only the opportunity to begin again, this time more wisely.

@KenBlount:  One of the goals of parenting is to shape your children to glorify God with the unique imprint He's put in them!

@LACavin:  So thankful for the Camp Grace men who are meeting before services to discuss leading & teaching elementary classes. @GraceChurchCM #invest

@Compassion:  The key to ending poverty? Hope! http://cintl.us/1ni

@Gospel_Project:  In all other religions, people are not truly serving God but themselves. They do good works in order to receive salvation and forgiveness. 

@JimCook_:  I needed more than just a sympathizer to my broken situation, I needed the power of a Savior to free me! @gracechurchsc

Tweets I Wrote

It's #football season. Or, the time of year when millions of people say "WE won" even though they never did so much as watch a practice.

8 elementary students signed up for the #chess club in #AllendaleSC. Big thanks to @pedrodeabreu, @CMateFoundation, & the local schools!

• Edit:  Now we have 16 students signed up.

"Faith is primarily about obedience, not risk." http://buff.ly/18LJkyG  via @theresurgence

"When we use volume to manage our kids we unwittingly turn ourselves into toxic high controllers." @Family_Matters http://buff.ly/15XzjSU  

When you place an order at the drive-thru microphone at Hardees, & the response is, "Ok, drive around, Mr. Joey.".... :) 

Scary moment: When you're watching "World War Z" & your son comes out of his room sleepwalking. Remember: #zombies aren't real (I hope).

Favorite Tweets from August

Earlier this month, I posted this photo with the caption:

They have had the pillow less than 12 hours, & it already has blood on it. #boys

Within minutes, I had dozens of "likes" on Instagram, mostly from people I don't know. I had a revelation, and then posted this:

And please remind me to NEVER again tag my Instagram pictures with #boys. Apparently every teeny-bopper likes that picture now.

Lesson. Learned.

Here were some of my favorite Tweets from the past month (from others, and some of my own). And you can always follow me on Twitter (@EspinosaJoey) and Instagram (@JoeyEspinosa)

Others

@BackRowBaptist:  Still a Virgin by Madonna #SecularArtistsGoChristian

@MikeGlenn:  What's the reward for good work? More work.

@FirstWorldPains:  "I am starving", in other words I live in a first world country and I'm slightly hungry.

@DailyKeller:  Religious people find God useful. Christians find God beautiful.

@CoachWithLove:  I don't know what my future holds, but I do know who holds my future. -Tim Tebow @TimTebow 

@GraceChurchSC:  Even when you are feeling God's discipline, you can rest in the fact that God cares enough about you to find you. #riseandfall

@WBlantonSoccer:  Sport will always frustrate you until u understand its true purpose & all the good that can be developed through it #perspective #Coaching

@DaveFerguson:  Good leadership starts with self-leadership: "Like a city whose walls are broken through is a person who lacks self-control." (Prv.25:28)

@PaulTripp:  No, you don't know what's coming, but God does and has already made ample supply.

Mine

Forgiven people forgive, as Michael Vick teaches us. http://buff.ly/1exbvU4  #NFL #grace 

I don't care if it's 83 degrees inside our house at 10PM. I made my calorie goal for the day, & I'm celebrating with hot cocoa.

Dear neighbor - I'm pretty sure you don't need your sprinklers on.

Parents & Teachers: Don't tell kids they're talented. Praise them for their hard work, persistence, & strategies. #growth

Elijah said his braces wire was poking his cheek. I got out a pair of pliers, a hammer, & a lighter. He says it's not bothering him anymore 

Favorite Tweets for July

We finished up a fun summer, full of camps. (Well, I have a week of football camp coming up.) Thankful for all the support we had, and all the people we got to work with!

When I wasn't running around with kids, I was coming across some good thoughts on Twitter. Here are some of my favorite tweets, from y'all and from me.

You can follow me at @EspinosaJoey.

Y'all's

@LeadersServe:  Great leaders empower others to manage today & focus their attention on the future.

@BryceAshlinMayo:  When we serve food to the poor but don't eat with them, we miss the point. 

@LosWhit:  May today's pulpits not be filled with talks on 5 steps to better marriages/lives/happiness/ect and instead be filled with the name of Jesus

@GoNasty15:  Falling down is a part of life. Getting back up is living.

@Greg_Boyd:  If you know "Jesus Christ & him crucified" (I Cor 2:2), you know all you REALLY need to know about God, yourself, other people & creation!

@PaulTripp:  Since the DNA of sin is selfishness (puts you in bondage to you), the work of grace is to rescue you from you.

@IamSecond:  #Life is too short to not #forgive.

@TrippCrosby:  Who's with me in starting a National Take Someone You Disagree with To Lunch Day?

My Own's

Denzell Washington (yes, his real name) from #AllendaleSC listed as one of top WR's in SC high school football. http://buff.ly/12c6mKa

What about Easter? // RT @lbgilpin1776: This is literally the best day of the year. Leave my country if you disagree. #america

Don't rejoice in good circumstances. Rejoice in the One who gave you that good circumstance.

I, too, used to think I was a perfect parent. Until I had my 2nd (& 3rd) child. http://buff.ly/1b3nawq  #parenting

Thankful for the men from @gracechurchsc who are serving at the prison in #AllendaleSC today. Looking forward to future ministry with them! 

“The strength you gain by letting go is more important than any object you own.” Julien Smith (The Flinch)

Teenager: "Coach, your wife is beautiful." Me: "I know. Why do you think I asked her to marry me?" // 14 years ago, I asked, & she said yes.

This is why we need mentors! "RT @FatherlessBook: 71% of all high school dropouts come from fatherless homes"

Favorite Tweets for May

My boys made me this for my birthday.

Big events in the month of May:

1. Start of spring practice for football
2. "May the 4th" (Be With You)
3. My birthday
4. Cooter Fest  
5. Mother's Day
6. Memorial Day

Of course, lots of other great things happening, and great thoughts being shared. Here are some of top Tweets from the past month.

From Others:

@BackRowBaptist:  Kirk Cameron: "You don't believe in the Bible? Let me quote the Bible to change your mind."

@DaveFerguson:  “Being a Christan is less about cautiously avoiding sin than about courageously and actively doing God's will.” ― Dietrich Bonhoeffer

@JoshElsom:  May the 4th be with you! pic.twitter.com/WTFXSek3bS

@GraceChurchSC:  Parenting is about #leadership plain and simple - an intimate and challenging kind, but it is about training, decision making and movement. 

@FirstWorldPains:  I want to be skinny, but I love food too much.

@FailedAtheist:  Having human rights means having human responsibilities in respect to those moral rights #ethics 

@PaulTripp:  In grace God leads you through what is hard so by that same grace he can soften your heart.

@Joseph_Berry:  Lightning McTurtle winning its heat in the 2013 Allendale Cooterfest @espinosajoey #Cooterfest #InItToWinIt https://vine.co/v/b0JDdMn5AVA

@JimGaffigan:  You know God only had one child because he considered Sunday a day of rest. 

@Lecrae:  Better to have a small role in God's story than to cast yourself as the lead in your own fiction. 

 

From Myself:

Had a dream last night that I was running the 400m hurdles again, & got 6th place. I'm not even a good athlete in my dreams!

Got to witness a historic moment in #AllendaleSC: 2 black teenagers baptized at Allendale Baptist Church.

God loves & shows justice to orphans, widows, & foreigners. So, His followers must do the same. (see Deut. 10:18-19)

#CooterFest is moving up in the snack selection. #deepfried http://instagram.com/p/ZJp8NMDylM/

Congrats to the #AllendaleSC High School Band, chosen to play in the Macy's Thanksgiving Parade, & the Russell Athletic Bowl in 2013!!! 

The Stress of Parenting

From Teaching with Poverty in Mind by Eric Jensen:

"Socioeconomic status correlates positively with good parenting, which, research has found, improves academic achievement (DeGarmo, Forgatch, & Martinex, 1999). Unfortunately, the converse is also true: the chronic stress of poverty impairs parenting skills, and disengaged or negative parenting in turn impairs children's school performance. 

Parents who are struggling just to stay afloat tend to work extra hours, odd shifts, or multiple jobs and are less able to provide attention and affection and to devote their time, energy, and resources to their children. These deficits have been associated with higher levels of externalizing behaviors and poor academic performance on children's part (Hsuch & Yoshikawa, 2007)."

Jensen's book focuses on the effects of poverty on a child's brain. Since I'm writing about poverty-related topics on my other blog (such as Poverty, Stress, and the Brain), what I want to point out here is how stress can lead to negative parenting.

When I have a bad day (or week), I am not focused on loving my kids. I want to be left alone, and not engagiing with my children. Are you with me?

We all have stresses in life (though those in poverty tend to live with more chronic stressors). The issue is how do you cope with them.

Because whether it comes to our child's "bad behavior," or our own negative parenting, we need to recognize that those are merely symptoms of a heart issue. What should you do? First, recognize that your behaviors are not the main issue. Second, know that your external actions are a result of internal beliefs. Third, admit that you are not properly dealing with the stressors in your life.

Will doing these three things cure your stress? Probably not. But it puts you on the right path. If you want to lead your children, you first have to lead yourself.

Let's look at the opposite case. A study from the University of Iowa reports that "infants who have a close, intimate relationship with a parent are less likely to be troubled, aggressive or experience other emotional and behavioral problems when they reach school age."

So to put it all together. . . . Stressed parents do not make great parents. Deal with that stress in a healthy way, and you will be freed to engage your child in an intimate relationship.


Related Links:

• Cuddling Is Good for Your Child's Brain   
• Surprising Ways Your Brain Works     
• Frustrated with School Work    
• Finding the Source   
• Affectionate Mothering    
• Breastfeeding Isn't Everything. Yeah, I Said That.   

Top 5 Books I Read in 2012

I read 19 books in 2012. That sounds like a lot, but a few of these were short (less than 100 pages). And I can't touch Jeff Ryan's accomplishment of reading 366 books in 2012. Still, I never would have guessed that I would have completed this many books in a year.

Also surprising (to me) was the number of fiction books. I read 3 fiction books this year (and one of them I read twice; you'll see why below), whereas I usually read 0 or 1 per year.

I read several devotional books, including My Utmost for His Highest, The Purpose Driven Life, and A Gospel Primer for Christians. I began Jesus Calling, but quickly felt uncomfortable with it, and stopped after a couple of days (so I didn't include this book in my total). And to round out my theology books, I read two by Francis Chan -- Forgotten God and Crazy Love.

I read some great books, some good books, and some books that made me say, "Meh." But here are five books that I found most illuminating, helpful, and challenging. (If you buy any of the books, you can use the link in the description.)

1. Fatherless Generation.  More than any other book, this book inspired and motivated me. I wrote about how fatherlessness can lead to Angry Boys and girls with Forgotten Fairy Tales, and helped me see the need for male mentors.
2. A Framework for Understanding Poverty. The author's premises are not without controversy, and I do not agree with everything in this book. However, this book helps provide just what the title promises -- a framework for understanding poverty. It helped me understand, among other things, the need to help children strive for middle class.
3. When Helping Hurts.  I gained a different perspective on what poverty is and what means we should use to "attack" it. For a parallel book that is easier to read and is less theologically-deep, check out Toxic Charity.
4. The Water Is Wide.  My first Pat Conroy book, in which he chronicles his year of teaching on Daufuskie Island. I will have some excerpts from this book on my other blog, beginning with this post.
5. The Hobbit.  I read The Hobbit twice in about 45 days, once by myself, and then to my kids. I read this book over a weekend when I was in high school, and I'm just as captivated by the story today. I also read The Fellowship of the Ring. That's as far as I got in high school before losing interest, but I hope to finish the Lord of the Rings trilogy this year.

As you can see, the topic of poverty was especially on my mind. Reading six books on the nature and consequences of poverty has helped me to understand our experiences in Allendale, SC.

Noticeably absent from my list of 19 books were any books specifically on parenting (the closest one to this category is The Read Aloud Handbook). I definitely need to read something in this category this year!

If you are looking for sites that give good book reviews, be sure to check out:

• Redeemed Reader  
• Brave Reviews 

Happy reading in 2013. 

PS -- You can go the complete opposite route, like Josh King. He will not read any new books in 2013.

Related Links:

• 6 Books That Shaped Me Into Who I Am   
• Helpful Resources     
• Top 5 Books I Read in 2013 (Bonus: 3 More That Helped Me Be a Better Parent)    

Favorite Tweets for July

The end of the summer sneaks up on you, huh?

Good-bye to one hot month. Hello to another one. My prediction for the August? An 238% increase in the number of football-related tweets. Since I'll be a coach this year, I might actually contribute some myself.

I'm at football camp this week. And today is a special day, my Spiritual Birthday.

My Favorite Thoughts from Twitter-World

@PastorTullian:  The only thing we contribute to our salvation is the sin that makes it necessary.

@DavidAllston:  God does not come into your life to fill a gap. He comes in to take over your life. 

@berkun:  The paradox of writing is you must spend endless hours alone in order to write well enough to connect with people you'll never meet. 

@JamieTheVWM:  I never ask other parents for parenting advice. Instead I look for adults I admire and ask what their parents did. 

@JimGaffigan:  “I have too much time on my hands and I want to stew in a broth of my own filth.” - People who take baths

@The90sLife:  "What doesn't kill you makes you smaller." - Mario  

@ChrchCurmudgeon:  Nice to see 1000s of young people using technology to land a man on the moon. Oh, wait. You're taking pictures of your latte. 

@RickWarren:  I've been with the poorest of the poor in over 100 countries and America's poor are rich compared to the poor elsewhere.

@PaulTripp:  No need to rule the people and circumstances of your life. They are under the careful rule of One wiser than you

My Top Contributions to Twitter-World

Self-doubt is not about humility, but about pride. http://buff.ly/RFlRrm  (via @desiringgod) 

Why does my son completely freak out when I try to pull his tooth? I'm removing a loose tooth, not your intestines. #insensitiveparenting

"The Bible was not given to increase our knowledge but to change our lives." DL Moody 

Thank you, @juliansmithtv, for your help in parenting my kids. http://buff.ly/MjVIQn

Me: "Buy these shorts." Wife: "I'm thinking what shirts I'd wear with it." Me:"I don't do that." Wife: "You should." #ouch

I think we just saw Homey the Clown making balloon animals.  

Favorite Tweets for May

Sender's busy course load

 I hope you had a great month. Another school year gone by!


Here are some great thoughts from others:

PatrickShealy:  3 vital truths The Church needs to be always proclaiming: 1)Holiness of God 2) Sinfulness of man and 3)The Gospel of grace for all of life.

TMProject:  "Mentors win by showing up." - @johnsowers #Summit8

ChurchCurmudgeon:  Ever been to a homeschool girls' soccer game? The parents sound like they're screaming a sermon outline. Faith! Hope! Charity! GRAAAACE!

JimGaffigan:  There should be a children's song "If you're happy and you know it, keep it to yourself and let your Dad sleep."

EdAlliance:  FACT: a high school dropout will earn $260,000 less than hs grads and $800,000 less than college grads in their lifetime.

chalmerscenter:  Fikkert: Poverty alleviation is about people and a highly relational process not just projects and products. #hwhpdx

mitchmillerme:  Youth leaders, fill parents with the hope that God is going to work in their students heart. Parents want that hope.


And here are some that I wrote:

"Without the intervention of caring mentors, fatherless children often miss out on their God-given potential." @johnsowers

I just had to stop a drunk guy from getting on the swings ride with all these little kids. #cooterfest

"If a teacher doesn't have the love of reading, the class can't catch it from her." Jim Trelease #education

Me: "What brought you to SC? A job change?" Dude: "Yes. I work for Verizon." Me: "Oh. So you're mobile?" #punny

AT&T has had the worst customer service I've ever had. (That includes Charter.) 10 phone calls so far, & still a 1/2-done job.

No, @im_old_gregggg. You don't need to dial "9" to use our landline phone. We have a home, not an office.

The speaker of this breakout session just said, "One thing I do do ..." #giggle 

Told my high school students that I'd trade grades for free babysitting. #joking #notreally 

Fatherlessness

Here are some statistics listed in Fatherless Generation: Redeeming the Story (John Sowers). Children from fatherless homes account for:

• 85% of youth who exhibit behavior disorders
• 85% of all youths in prison
• 80% of rapists motivated with displace anger
• 71% of high school dropouts
• 71% of pregnant teenagers
• 63% of youth suicides

These stats are especially applicable to what we see in Allendale, SC, where 70% of households do not include a married couple.

But I'm sure there are fatherless children right around you. The question is, "What can you do about it?" Are you involved in the lives of fatherless children, to encourage, mentor, and care for? This involvement can come in many forms:

• volunteering in your child's school
• coaching
• serving in an after school program
• tutoring
• etc.

If you are not already, I encourage you to get involved soon. Those children need every chance they can get to succeed, and you could be just the positive influence that they need.

Top Posts of 2011: Basic Problems in Allendale (#3)

Continuing with the series on my Top 5 Posts in 2011, today is actually a post about Allendale. It was originally written on this blog, but I moved it over after I created the Mission: Allendale blog.

This post, #3 in my list, is about the 3 Basic Problems in Allendale: Poor Education, Teenage Pregnancy, and Disconnected Dads. I still see these as three common issues, but I need to write more about the key problem that I see (look for it in 2012).

Happy reading!

Saturday Round-Up (August 13)

Only a few this week. Was on vacation, including 4 different parts of the state in less than a week.


Malicious Book Reviews. An author was awarded monetary compensation after receiving a malicious book review. Since I've done some book reviews (including Shepherding a Child's Heart, Parenting By the Book, Hints on Child Training, and Read and Share Storybook Bible) and I plan to do more, I should be careful, huh?

Real Men Repent.  "My entire life I battled sin, and I always came up on the losing end. When I placed my faith in Jesus Christ and through the repentance of my sins, I received the mercy of God and acceptance as his son."

China's Puzzling Flat Line.  The GDP in China has tripled in the past 12 years, but their citizens don't rate their lives as being any better.

The Wrong Body Language. Helpful hints for communicating well with others. 

Social Class as Culture. What social class you are in is more than just how much money you have. "People from lower classes have fundamentally different ways of thinking about the world than people in upper classes -- a fact that should figure into debates on public policy, according to the authors." This is similar to the case I made in Love Them Into the Middle Class.

Poverty: Allendale, Bahamas, and the Gospel

Stocking the Allendale food bank

What would make a young lady earn money (by babysitting and selling jewelry) for the purpose of leaving one impoverished area and "vacationing" in another? That is exactly what Lydia Fastzkie did, coming to Allendale last month (this article was written by her mom, Shannan).


Poverty Is the Same, and Different
The culture of poverty in Eleuthera (Bahamas) is very similar to Allendale.


Read the rest of the post on the Mission: Allendale blog . . .