Cease and Know

Note: Yesterday I posted this same blog post on my other blog, but wanted to make sure I updated the readers of all my platforms. 

For the past few years, I have regularly considered giving up blogging. Every three or four months or so, I would wake up, think about all the things going on in my life, and I would be 100% ready to stop blogging.

 And every time, that very same day, I would get an email, or a note, or a text thanking me for having written something that encouraged or motivated them. 

And I would get back to my laptop and hack away at it.

Sometimes those encouragements would be from a close friend, and sometimes from someone I knew casually, and sometimes from a completely stranger. It never ceased to amaze me how God would use my ramblings to help someone else, and to give a voice to the voiceless and an image to the unseen.

But now I am sure that I need a break from blogging. Not just a week or a month, but for the rest of the year (or longer).

The Investment of Blogging

Writing has been good for me, personally. It forces me to think deeply, and to analyze and clarify my thoughts. And then when I get pushback or comments, it makes me think even more deeply and broadly. And it's been an outlet for my frustrations and confusion, whether or not anyone else reads what I write.

But it also has taken a lot of time. The thinking, the writing, the editing, the planning, the promoting . . . it all adds up.

For a long time, this process has been worth my time. During our time in Allendale, blogging was our primary way of keeping our friends and supports informed of what we were doing. For us, regular blogging was better than occasional newsletters.

Now that I'm back in Greenville, working for Mill Community Ministries, and (now) Furman, and (for a while) a school, I don't think my need for a "newsletter" is as great. It's easier to keep people posted of what's going on.

But even more than that, God has been pressing me to consider how I'm using my time. With the two or three jobs I've had, plus some upcoming additional responsibilities, I have to shave off some things that don't directly help me provide for my family.

And speaking of family, I need to spend more time engaging them, and cultivating my relationships with my wife (as we are in the midst of some challenging transitions), daughter (beginning high school in two weeks!), and sons (one of whom is not far from becoming a teenager).

God has also been revealing that I need to do better with how I am engaging my community and culture. I am convinced that I need to spend more time in intentional-discipleship relationships.
Adding time for jobs, family members, and ministry . . . means I have to shave time off somewhere else. And one place I'll try to gain time back is by ceasing from regular blogging.

Giving Up for Good?

Let me be clear. I'm not saying that I'm giving up blogging for good. I'm just taking a break until the end of the year, and I'll re-evaluate then.

I will also be doing some guest posting. But writing 2 or 3 posts a month is very different than 3 or 4 posts per week.

I have lots that I'd love to write about. I have stories to tell, silenced voices to amplify, and images to make known. So, I'll be depending on and looking for other ways to communicate.

Check out my Contact page to connect with me in other ways (social media, website, etc). I may even write an occasional post here if I feel like this would be the best way to communicate.

Heck, this may all be a mistake. I may be missing out on a great opportunity. But I'm trusting that God is leading me in this way. And if I'm wrong, I'll trust that He can make up the difference. (He can.)

Thank You, and Please Help Me

I'm thankful for the opportunity that blogging has given me to get thoughts out of my brain, and I'm thankful for you reading those words and connecting with me.

And now I can still use you. . . . If and as you feel led, please keep me accountable. Ask me if I'm redeeming the time I am gaining back. Instead of using my time to escape, I need to use this extra time to:

• lead and disciple my family
• disciple others on a personal level
• find other ways to be a voice for those who need a voice
• rest and recreate (see sessions 5 and 6 of A Man and His Work)

"Cease striving and know that I am God;
I will be exalted among the nations,
I will be exalted in the earth."
Psalm 46:10

Becoming a Better Parent, from the Inside Out

Can a movie help you become a better parent? Even more, can a kids movie help you?
Movies have helped me other times, such as with Toy Story 3 and Willy Wonka. And it happened again recently, when I took my sons to see Inside Out, the latest Pixar movie.

(Disclaimer and shout-out: We rarely go to movies, but this movie was provided for free for us, and for all the patients of Palmetto Family Orthodontics.) 

How did this movie help me, and help me lead my family? We've started a new "tradition" -- sharing our feelings from the day, each evening at the dinner table.

(2nd disclaimer and shout out: This idea is also influenced by one of my favorite books I read this year, The Giver.)

Want to learn more about how God is helping me be a better parent, and what we are doing based on this movie? Check out my latest guest post on the Family Matters blog, How "Inside Out" Made Me a Better Parent.


Related Links:

• Inside Out Can Help Parents Avoid This Big Mistake (from Crosswalk)  
• Inside Out: Lessons in Sadness, Sonship, and Prodigals (from CCEF)
• Dysfunction Among Disney Families (just classic)

Disagree, and Love

I want my kids to be around people they disagree with.

No, I don't want them to feel the need argue with all kinds of people. I don't want them to try to always prove their case. But I do want them to be around people that think differently.

Why?

1. To solve problems.  None of us have all the answers to life's problems. Being around people with different opinions, experiences, and perspectives is the only way to engage the big issues in our communities and country. 
2. To be open to new ideas.  Going along with the first point, my children need their minds and perspectives broadened. I want them to see new places and hear new ideas, so that they can learn more about this wonderful world that God created, and about all kinds of people that He made in His own image. 
3. To confirm what really is true.  This seems opposite to point #2, but stay with me. How can we really know what we believe unless we allow our beliefs to be challenged?
4. To live out love.  I think this is the most important. If you only fellowship and talk to people that think just like you, can you show them Christ-like love? Remember, Jesus came to die for us while we were His enemies (Romans 5:8). He pursued us when we opposed Him. What better opportunity to show God's love than to love someone that you disagree with, or have little in common with?

Will you encourage your children to be around people they disagree with? Even more, will you seek to be around people who think and feel differently than you? Will you pursue opportunities to love with a Christ-like love?

"For if you love those who love you, what reward do you have? Do not even the tax collectors do the same? If you greet only your brothers, what more are you doing than others? Do not even the Gentiles do the same? Therefore you are to be perfect, as your heavenly Father is perfect."  (Matthew 5:46-48)

 Related Links:

• Letters of Love 
• Power in Words     

photo credit: Peace and Love Homie via photopin (license)

Helping Your Child Prepare for Camp

Last year my son Elijah participated in three camps -- 2 sleep-away and 1 day camp. He had a great time.

At one of the camps, I found out afterwards that he had a troubling incident. I was concerned and defensive, and ready to pull the plug on future camp experiences for him. But after several conversations with him and another parent (who shared his perspective and wisdom), I saw that I was being too hasty.

More than anything, we saw these camps as opportunities for my son to grow and deal with real-life situations, all under the protection of trained and trusted leaders.

Are your children going to summer camp this year? You can help them get the most of their experience by following these three principles: talk, connect, and equip.

Want to learn more? Check out my guest post, 3 Simple Ways to Prepare Your Child for Summer Camp, on Doctor Joe Says.


Related Links:

• Why Summer Camps Are Important    
• Positively Contagious   

The Cripplegate: For Non-Conformists Like Me

I seem to always be slow on the trends. I'm not just talking about fashions, since I don't even register on that scale at all. But what do you expect for a guy whose standard apparel in college was shorts, t-shirt, socks, and sandals?

I'm behind on things like technology. During my first year of college, my roommate and I didn't have an answering machine. We didn't have a DVD player until November 2006. I got my first cell phone in 2007.

I'm behind on books. Something in me almost refuses to read popular books. I didn't peruse books like The Prayer of Jabez, A Purpose Driven Life, and Radical until 3 or 4 years after their peak. I find pleasure in being out of the popular path. Or, maybe I just like being hard-headed.

I recently came across a new blog, called the Cripplegate. The first thing that appealed to me was that it bucked common beliefs. It's written by a team of Christ-followers who present theological ideas, many of which do not conform to "tradition."

Here are a sampling of posts. I hope you will enjoy them as much as I do.

Whom Shall I Fear? Rescuing Daniel from the Children's Books 

The great impression on Darius was not Daniel’s example, Daniel’s faith or Daniel’s courage, but rather the sovereign God that Daniel served.   Do you fear and tremble before a sovereign God?  Is that what you usually think of when you think of Daniel and the Lions’ den?  I’m all for helping kids get a good night’s sleep, but let’s not be satisfied with answering the question “Where’s God when I’m afraid?”  Let’s ask the more important question, “Who’s afraid of my God?”

A Message for Vanderbilt's Leadership

This demonstration of white collar persecution has succeeded in lighting a fire under their faith. Essentially, you have brought the gospel to life for them. You have turned these students into fervent prayers for Vanderbilt, interceding for the students there and for the gospel. You have provoked them into becoming fervent evangelists. They know now first hand that they are surrounded by people who are alienated from God.

Reliable Source Reveals November's Election is Already Fixed

What is this reliable source?  — the Bible.  And no, I am not advocating some secret code contained in Scripture.  I’m sure if you rearranged the letters in some verse in the book of Revelation, you could spell Mitt Romney, Barack Obama or Cap’n Crunch!  No, the Bible does not reveal who the next president will be, but it does reveal that the outcome has already been fixed by a sovereign God.

When the Misson Becomes Protesting

At the end of the day, the church must mourn over the rampant sin in our nation, including abortion. However, let’s trust our Lord by sticking to his mission (disciple-making) with his prescribed methods of teaching the word and gospel-centered, day-in day-out ministries through the local church as our best approach to this and every other issue. It will be through individual lives changed by the gospel that people will choose life instead of abortion.

What Blogs Do You Read?

I love to write. I've been blogging for over 3 years now, on 3 different blogs (and a few guest posts). It has been a great outlet for me, as a way to work through thoughts in my head. I think I've been more amazed that anyone wants to listen to what I have to say.

I also love to read. I've traditionally read 90+% non-fiction books, from theology to leadership to biographies and more. And now I follow 50-60 blogs across a variety of categories. I don't read every post from every blog; using Google Reader, I skim the headlines and see what might be interesting for me, or for any of my friends and followers.

I have learned so much from reading from a variety of blogs (besides have a streak of winning some give-aways). Because the truth is, if you are a parent you are a leader. And leaders are readers. You have to continually grow and learn, so that you can better disciple your children.

Here are some blogs that I've started following over the past few months; maybe you'll enjoy one of them as well:

• Kickin' it in Buddenville.  This is by our friend Susan Rice. Any blog that comes out of Allendale County is worth following.
• Julian Freeman.  I don't always get theology stuff, and I don't always get Canadians (sorry Nicky & Des). But this guy is good.
• JBM Thinks.  For any parent who has a child that plays organized sports, this is a must-follow.
• Enough of the Cat Talk.  In the past 15 months, I've become suddenly passionate about education. Darlena brings up some great talking points.

Now, let me know in the comments: What's your favorite blog? If you have a few, you can name your favorite "famous" blog (100's of readers) and your favorite "obscure" blog.

**image courtesy of mzacha via rgbstock.com

Top Tweets for March

Excitement like this kicked off the month in Allendale

Great thoughts by others:

• mitchmillerme:  After reading the comments christians make on other christians blog post and status updates I've decided I only want to minister to the lost
• FirstWorldPains:  When I Google my name somebody else's information comes up first. #firstworldpains
• Kabmwangi:  Anybody can afford a smile, but a radiant face reflects what cannot be hid in a smile. A smile impresses, a radiant face inspires.
• Foster_White:  There are two rules for success: 1) Never tell everything you know.
• FunnyTweets:  Why does Facebook even give me the option to 'like' my own status? Of course I like my status. I'm hilarious. 
• JimGaffigan:  I like taking my kids to IHOP. They eat like 5 dollars worth of food and do like 40 dollars worth of damage to the restaurant.
• Tim Hawkins:  The term 'Christ Follower' is pretty popular with Christians right now. 'Messiah Stalker' not so much.

Here are my so-so thoughts (you can follow me @EspinosaJoey):

• Every moment, every day is an opportunity to respond to God.
• Just got done playing Scrabble with the boys I tutor. A couple of them are pretty good! It sure beats doing worksheets.
• Frustration just means more opportunity for God to work.
• Cheaters never win, especially when you cheat on a test and all 3 of you get the same wrong answers. #busted
• Want a quick snapshot of Allendale, SC? Here's some of the good and some of the challenges. http://missionallendale.wordpress.com/2012/03/09/allendale-county-information-guide-2012/
• Done preaching. Now walking home from church with my boys. #smalltownlife
• The ultimate in drive-through service. Only in #AllendaleSC. http://bit.ly/GQqNSl
• My phone autocorrects the word #Seder to 'sewer' #jewishproblems

Communication and Ministry

As you may recall, I've done some writing for the Kidmin1124 blog. Though I haven't written as much as I've wanted to, I've enjoyed the opportunity to get some of my ministry thoughts out there to help other church leaders.

Here are the latest two articles I've written:

• 7 Ways to Frustrate Your Team with Your Communications.  "Communicating is more of an art than a science."
• Don't Create a Ministry Kingdom.  From an experience that I had a few years ago, that showed me a common battleground and division in church leadership.

To see the full list of the articles I've written for this blog, click here.